Discussing your past with your partner

By Nwele Euphemia

Everyone has a past, a past that they are not proud of and a past that they could be proud of. Mistakes are a part of human existence, no one can say they have never made a mistake before, no matter how little it is.

Some people believe that ‘who we are today, is as a result of our past’, and to a large extent I agree to this – but depending on what part your past is tilting you too, you can always tilt it back, you own you.

Your past matters in your relationship, but when to discuss this past with your partner is what you should know, you should not go blabbing to every guy you meet or are in a relationship with about the kind of things you have done previously or how your previous relationships have been.

When it comes to talking to your partner about your past relationships or other things that took place in your life, timing is key. Truthfully talking about your past to someone you love increases the bond you both share and opens room for better understanding.

Knowing the right time to share your past experience is important, you need to be sure that the person you are with is not someone who would up and leave anytime soon, that he/she is someone who is also willing to share their experience with you too.

You both must have come to that stage of your relationship where you are friends and you can trust each other, preferably you both should at least have been together for a while, you can share when your partner asks too, when they want to know.

Because, it is important that they want to know, if they do not ask to know then you really do not have to share except you want to, or that you know it is something that might pop up somehow in your future.

When you know your relationship is serious and heading towards a life union it is also import that you both seat and talk about your pasts, especially that part of your past that could be a problem to your present.

It is not bad talking to your partner about your past, it brings you both closer together, to understand each other better. Sharing information about you and your past is cool, but do that only when you both have known each other for a while and when you both want to know about each other’s pasts.