Photo Credit: Voices of Youth
I read an Instagram post on a friend’s blog about two weeks ago concerning Indian lovers who committed suicide because both parents denied accepting their nuptial engagement. I was indifferent and, in my thoughts, suggested that both lovers were idle and has no meaningful thing to do with their lives. I mean, who with all the pressure from social circles to make it big quickly even considers death over unaccepted love? Stupid, Illogical and unwise. Even for an unreciprocated; which I guess is more heartbreaking, I would still get to live for a century. Moreover, with the comments that preceded the post, my thoughts were applauded; I couldn’t feel more elated.
Then after a couple of days, I was gushing over a picture of Banky W and Adesuwa Etomis (popular Nigerian musician and actress respectively) I had reminisce over their grand marriage ceremony that stole the Nigerian media in 2017 for a fortnight; if not more. Most people couldn’t believe anything less that it was true love between; with all that material benefits who wouldn’t say it was real love. We cherished the material benefits that both couples would forever enjoy from each other. Most people clamoured for their nuptial as it potent to breed more material success was high.
Gone are the days when love was preached to be kindness, patience, forgiving, compromising even if there are we don’t beat drums about those anymore but trumpet about what material rewards does this love got to exude. These days we want love to come with an abundance of material benefits. Who cares? I can’t be in love and be in penury. Our parents are also encouraging us to become gold diggers, once you say anything about John, mother asks – hope he has money? And father would concur with a question- hope he has a house? After all you need finance to nurture love.
All the long sermons about love as kind, patience, caring, sacrificing were for the old generations, who were blinded by so many stories of lovers committing suicide over denial of love. How come this generation has not produced a love story so powerful as Remuo and Julliet, Arms and the Man, Titanic not to mention the common Cinderella story?
Check our social media posts; it’s only when there are material harvests that we mostly flaunt our significant other. Post tags titles with – ‘my new ride by Bae, it’s my birthday and my man decided to spoil me’. Even check out the popular Instagram posts on Jorofunmi; the ladies become instantly confused and cannot abandon the guy and believe she is smitten by love, when her catch he has lifted up her burden of artificial hair and cosmetics. If your love is not breeding any superficial rewards, you need a replacement of him/ her. The females yearn for financial reaping and the males want physical consolation prizes.
I would exonerate ladies who cling to ready-made men to provide material comfort at their beck and call, over a guy who loves you but he may not offer you options of kellogs, golden country but give you Nasco or good morning cornflakes if you need a cereal. It is a sad reality that in our fear not to be stricken with a managerial life we use most of our head over our heart in picking a lover or even a spouse. Common, Mr. 37 is financially buoyant he has long started his life, cars, house investments, why not pair up with him instead of tagging along with this dude.
I presume it would take a century before I ride in my dream car or buy that brand lipstick if I stick with this financially struggling dude unless a miracle happens; which rarely happens. Besides, who would envy my man, since he is still branding not already branded. I want to hear friends and foes gush over how classy his car is and how they find his abode fancy. Dear feminists readers please do not suggest to me tell me that a lady does not need a man to fulfill her material tastes, she can fend for herself; being a female doesn’t make her invalid.
Please save the argument for another day; I am proudly a traditionalist who believes that it is my right to partake in the success of my man. He can’t be a billionaire and you still expect my hair extensions to tangle and wrangle with the slightest combing. It can’t be. I can only tolerate such when he earns less zero digits
Maybe or maybe not I wouldn’t even blink to money and embrace love, if I happened to live in a better country with functioning systems and a whole lot working for progress. Sadly since I reside in a populous nation where the government does nothing better than to make life more difficult for all, I would still push money whilst still chasing love. Realistically, like I tell myself I would not get financially less but more.
Maybe or maybe not I wouldn’t even blink to money and embrace love, if I happened to live in a better country with functioning systems and a whole lot working for progress. Sadly since I reside in a populous nation where the government does nothing better than to make life more difficult for all, I would still push money whilst still chasing love.
Call it selfishness, the desire to have my cake and still much them, it is your opinion. So back to my question- which is money or love I embrace the two. I would kill two birds with just a shot. I can’t be swimming in love and drowning in poverty. For me to even get to love, my significant have to be responsible not necessarily super rich. Yes, he has to have the ability to look after something monetarily he doesn’t have to be filthy wealthy before I love. I mean I also have to bring in some bacon, so we can apportion our duties and live happily ever after.
Then for you who money must be the deal, a quantum of it and a farewell to any feeling called love. I can only wish you good and hope the wealth is everlasting but if the money beat eventually stops, I pray you can still find something out of the empty beat to dance to. On the other love if you are the next Julliet or Remuo of our times I can only applaud you and bid you success. Life is choices!