Signs the guy you’re dating has an ego problem

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By Miracle Udeagha

Hello everyone. With the ease of the lockdown and all, how did your week go? Well, I’m still staying home cos truthfully my job doesn’t really need me going out. So better safe than sorry.

Today, I’m going to be thrashing egoistic guys. Yes, I said thrashing lol. It’s very personal to me. Let me share an experience I once had with an egoistic guy. This guy has serious ego problems. I’ll now address him as Patrick.

I met him while I was working at my previous place of employment. He was a client at the time. He had to get my number as I was the link up to when he needed our services. If you’re Igbo, you probably know how Igbos love it when they meet their fellow “brothers” and “sisters”. Lol. Patrick is Igbo so he felt relaxed doing business with my company through me. Few weeks after his first visit, we got talking (of course less about work). I wasn’t paying much attention to Patrick cos I’m really not a fan of Igbo guys. If you’re close to me, you probably know this. Patrick clearly wanted something more than a business relationship but I didn’t give him any green light lol. This didn’t stop him from coming around though.

He would always find excuse to come around our office. Either he had “referred people to us and he wanted to bring them himself” or “his sister was coming into the country and she was insisting on using our services”. What’s my own? I was always happy to get more customers if it meant I would get paid at the end of the month by my boss.

His sister became fond of me as well. Once, on her arrival in Nigeria, she came to our office bearing lots of gifts for me. She got me perfumes, makeup and a few other things accompanied with cash. I was surprised as were my colleagues. I asked her why she had bothered after thanking her, of course. She said she just likes my personality. Haa okay na. My colleagues wouldn’t stop teasing me after that day. They started calling me “Patrick’s wife”. Lmao! Patrick’s wife ko

A few months later, I quit my job at the establishment. I got a call from Patrick a few days later “Ada, I’m at your office as I’m hearing you don’t work here anymore. What happened?” “Nothing really sir. It’s not just the right fit for me anymore”. “Oh. Can we see and talk? Where do you stay?” After much reluctance, I agreed to meet up with him. Jesus Christ! This guy wouldn’t stop talking about himself See me thinking he wanted to find out why I had left the job o. He asked o but he didn’t wait for me to explain why. He started talking about how he decided to start his own business because he couldn’t stand employers. From there, he moved onto another topic. I didn’t even interrupt him. I just jejely took out my phone and started chatting. “Ada this your phone is old oh. How long have you been using it?” “Oh about four years now” “No wonder you don’t hear me properly when I call” He said laughing out loud. I just smiled so it wouldn’t seem like I was being rude.

A man with an ego problem always sees himself as superior to others.

A few weeks later, Patrick called. I refused to pick the call. He didn’t take the hint and kept calling. I picked up after about 5 missed calls. “Ada, will you come and know my house? Let me send you  the address so you can come.” “Mr Patrick, I don’t visit people I’m not familiar with” “Ada! What do you mean? You know me nah. Come and see me joor. I won’t kidnap you” He said laughing. He always found his jokes funny for some reason. I clearly stated again that I wasn’t going to come see him. He sent his address anyway.

A man with an ego problem will never take NO for an answer.

Few months later, I fell very ill. If you’re close to me, you probably know when this was. I wrote about it in a post I titled “My June Miracle”. I could barely do anything. Even breathing was a struggle. Patrick called a couple times and I didn’t pick up. I think he finally got the hint and didn’t call for a while after that. I got better about 6 weeks later. I had lost a lot of weight during the illness and I was trying to recover. One evening, Patrick called and said he was on my street and wanted to see me. I reluctantly dressed up and went out to see him. His car was parked just across my house. As I was crossing over to go meet him, he wound down his window and went “Ahh Ada you have really lost weight o!” “Hei God, did I offend you in any way? Abi which kind of punishment is this na?” I thought to myself as I got into his car. He kept teasing me about how much weight I had lost and I had to tell him it was as a result of how sick I had been few weeks back. Then, he started questioning why I hadn’t picked or returned any of his calls. (Errm, oga what part of “I was sick” didn’t you get?) “Even if you were sick, is that why you won’t pick my calls? Do you know what I was passing through that period too?”he grumbled.

A man with ego problems will always put his needs above yours.

A few times Patrick would come over unannounced. He would just call and say he was outside. Sometimes, he would have called a day or two before to say he was coming that day and then he wouldn’t show up that day again till he felt like. Lol. Maybe he felt I was jobless or something so I would always be at his beck and call cos I didn’t quite understand this rude behavior. When it’s not that he had paid my bride price or we were even dating. On one occasion, he called me on whatsapp without asking for permission. I ignored the call and explained to him why it was rude to call someone on whatsapp without first asking no matter how familiar you are with the person. Guess what? Uncle clearly kept this to heart and held a grudge against me cos some few weeks later, I sent a BC to my contacts and he responded by yapping about how he had called me and I had told “him, a whole Patrick” that it was rude to call someone on whatsapp without permission. That how can a whole him ask for permission to call someone on whatsapp? A man with ego problems always feels he is right.

On another occasion, he wanted me to assist him with bookings at my previous place of work. I told him I couldn’t cos I didn’t work there anymore. He insisted I helped him cos after-all I was still in contact with some of my colleagues there. I reluctantly agreed on the condition that we went there together so I could introduce him to my replacement. He agreed and we fixed a day we would go which was a Sunday. On Saturday, I messaged him telling him I would attend fellowship on Sunday so we could either go before or after my fellowship. He chose after. Sunday came, I finished fellowship and came home. Waited a while for Patrick. He didn’t show up or call so I called. He quickly responded and said he was at a meeting so he wouldn’t be able to make it as planned. He could have sent a message earlier to tell me this so we could reschedule but he chose not to. I sent him a message later that night telling him how disrespectful it was of him to have stood me up knowing fully well that I was doing him a favour. He responded with ” I know. Sorry”. The next day, I had to go assist a friend with interviews at his office. While I was there, Patrick started calling non-stop. I would ignore the call as I was busy conducting interviews but he kept calling as usual. I quickly texted him saying I was busy and he could call back later. He responded with pictures of my street and his current location which was my street saying “I’m on your street”. I didn’t bother responding. Later that evening, he chatted me up saying “I came to pick you up so we could go to your former office as planned but you ignored my calls” LMAO! “As planned? We were supposed to go there yesterday not today. Besides, I wasn’t home. I have a life, you know?” He responded saying how I should have picked up his call anyway cos I left him out there on my street wasting fuel and what not. A man with ego problems will always insist on having his way.

I just noticed the post is getting too long. Let’s just end it here lol. I’m sure you get the points I’ve been trying to make using Patrick as a case study I would love to hear your thoughts on this. What other traits do you think a man with ego problems exhibits? Thanks for reading to the end. I hope you all have a pleasant weekend!

Editor’s Note: This article first appeared on MIRA’S-NOT-SO-SECRET-DIARY. CRISPNG obtained permission to republish it. However, it has been slightly modified to reflect our house style. You can read the original article here.

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